Contemplations

Cost of Pacemaker for 1 patient		$40,000.
Cost of TPN for 1 patient	$800/wk
Weeks On Home PN ( to 10/22/09)	262	209,600
Additional Cost to OHIP by NOT re-inserting Pacing Device (excluding Dr. visits, Clinic follow-up, diagnostics, lab tests, etc.)		($169,600)

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Thank you Home Parenteral Nutrition Team: Anne Childs, Home Parenteral Nutrition Coordinator; Suzanne Hansen, Registered Dietitian; and Suzanne Revill, RN. You are experts in your fields. You are available, accessible, capable, responsive and empathetic. I appreciate your commitment to delivering excellence in patient care. No question that your program needs more resources. Welcome to the team, Stella Stevens, RN.

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I wonder...If you're an atheist, can you make an insurance claim for an Act of God?

I definitely fell in love with not driving the school carpool - 2 weeks of winter break plus 1 week of vacation for Jess ... it'll be hard to go back to it!

What's that? Two months? Three months without a post? Sorry. Things just got a little away from me.

If Andrew's having surgery, it must be August again!

Bickerman, huh. Bickerton, huh.

I keep hearing that the price of crude oil is setting new records. I wonder what polite oil costs.

Mama always said 'If you don't have anything good to say, stay quiet' ....that's why I haven't posted in such a long time.

I sampled a vegan meal replacement drink. It didn't go so well.

How to tell that someone hacked my Facebook account...my page was updated, or you were "poked" or you got a post on your "superwall". I'm a terrible Facebooker - I wouldn't want to be my 'friend'.

I'm hooked on Weeds (Showcase, Wed. nights) . It's addictive. I guess I should follow it up with an hour of Intervention .

You can do whatever you want, as long as it makes everyone else happy.

Suspectable? I don't think so. It may have been suspicious, but certainly not suspectable.

I feel powerful every time I click "add to Dictionary" when I'm spell-checking in Word.

Spooky...2,007 homes were destroyed in the California forest fires of 2007.

Happy 3 year anniversary!

Information in the wrong hands can be dangerous.

OMG! I'm going to turn on the sprinkler right now. Charged with Having a Brown Lawn

"I'm sure that probably..." is no different than saying "Maybe"

Comment I made in an email: I'm in a bit of an emotional recession characterized by short term decline in brain activity and production with an uncertain forecast... not looking at foreclosure, but lately i'm just scraping those paymentst together. (I don't usually recycle my words, but this says it pretty well.)

{yawn} Study conclusion: Toronto's boring.

I've tried everything! I watered the lawn, left the windows open and washed the car...still it doesn't rain!

Loved the creepy The Number 23; that is, until I realized my birthday adds up to, yep, 23.

OK. It's pretty obvious that I haven't been feeling very well this week...my Random blog has been updated every day!

Andrew's response to the recommendation that one not use his iPod during a lightning storm: His shoes were burnt and blown apart. That's another reason for me not to wear shoes when I'm cutting the grass.

I must be losing my sense of humor...didn't laugh when someone slapped a QUARANTINED sign on our porch. Now, I think it's funny, but not at the time. [Read about VRE here]

Hey! How come nobody told me there was an arithmetic error on these pages? It's fixed up now.

Anton Chekhov said: Any idiot can face a crisis - it is this day-to-day living that wears you out.

I object to professors giving grade marks in a philosphy course.

It's better to be a distracted artist than a tortured artist.

Another anniversaire marked. Dates and ages changed - check (or would that be cheque?)

I guess I needed to explain my Great-great-great-great-great Uncle Abdullah Donald Trump Abu Sumra more clearly. Maybe that would translate into a higher level of service from CC.

Actual headline: Intelligence Not Linked to Wealth. Well, Duh!

Roni tells me I don't drink enough in a day to stay hydrated. She's right. "That's why I run extra bags of saline," I remind her.

I will never see a popcorn bucket the same way again.

Sure, I've had some Contemplations. They just weren't especially clever...routine, average, everyday things on my mind.

All this to-do about The Secret. If it's a secret, should there be this much talk about it?

I keep adding it up. Week after week. Milestone set at $100,000 spent on my current treatment. That's $60,000 more than they needed to. This is what they prefer to do, how they prefer to handle it...Other uses for that money (after a pacer for me)

You see? Wishes can come true. Britney's been out of the news for 2 whole days! Jealous, Paris Hilton gets herself arrested on Sunset Strip just to get back into the papers.

Susan, the nurse filling in for my regular nurse, doesn't know what to make of all this. She was here today and was stunned to record in my chart that I have been unwell for almost a week. I spent 2 out of 5 days in bed completely and have only done that which must be done during the other 3 days. "How long will this go on?" she asked. "At some point, I will either feel better or worse; or I will improve my ability to function at this level," I answered.

A recent study found that people come up with the best ideas at 10:30 a.m. The press conference to release the results was at, you guessed it, 10:30 a.m.

I haven't done a Sudoku puzzle for over a year...it's too mainstream for me.
Little known fact that I had kept the Chronology page up to date. First date on the page is 2003!

It's Feb. 2. Must watch Groundhog Day...again...and again...and again.

Who knew that being Random required so much planning?

Proven at the Allergy Clinic: I have a severe latex allergy. The doc wanted to verify it for himself. I wasn't making it up.

An opportunivore is defined as A person who eats whatever he or she can find.

Is it ok to wear my Goodyear sneakers to the Firestone Clinic?

Five long days.

"It's encouraging to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Just be careful that it's not a train." It was meant to be inspiring wisdom, but it doesn't quite come across as inspiring.

It's a good thing that Michelle had arranged a one-year sabbatical...otherwise, she might've had to quit her job to keep up with all the goings-on of 2006!

I'm playing at least 3 different games involving license plates right now. So when a police officer asked me if I had the plate information on the Lincoln, I was surprised that I couldn't remember it. It wasn't one that would advance any of the games, so I had dismissed it. How was I to know I was going to need it?

I found it easier to wrap the Christmas presents if I measured out the paper first...not like someone who was cutting paper then looking for a present that fit it!

One lesson drivers seem to remember from their Drivers' Education classes: Reduce your speed when the roads are wet. Just to clarify: that doesn't mean from 100 km/h to 40 km/h in a light shower!

Commercial I'm waiting to hear: Two On-Star equipped vehicles hit each other. The same operator assists both drivers.

The Improv Club organizes its meetings in advance. I guess that's OK as long as they don't plan the agenda.

Being iron-deficient is not the same as being anemic.

How could any M.P.P. vote against a bill that is called The Health Systems Improvements Bill? I won't pretend to know the content of the bill. By its title alone, how could one say he's against improving health systems?

Rarely do I say "I'm not up to seeing you/talking today." It's not personal. It's different than admitting I'm not good company. Not being 'good company' is disposition. Attitude. Not being 'up to it' is physical. Not capable of it.

See, if I regularly update the Very Random page, it wouldn't be random.

The allergist says I'm in a persistent state of allergic reaction. It's no wonder...I'm surrounded by nuts!

I'm thinking about thinking about some things. Hey, it's a start, and you've got to start someplace!

November 25, 2006 marks the 35th birthday of email technology. Know what that means?
I'm older than email!

First time in 7 years that I had to replace my Epi-pens because they expired...I hadn't used them in a year!

Lju's such a terrific person. I regret ever tormenting him with a dinner roll.

Finally! AZVY advances the game!

I am better at giving help, than accepting help.

Seriously Astute Powers of Observation - Suzanne to Chris at Clinic appointment: "Your jeans are baggier." (They were newer and straight out of the dryer!) "Is that a knee brace under your slacks?" (Actually, I had not considered the weight of the brace.) "Empty your pockets."...and all I had in my pocket was the parking stub! Stella to Chris: "What about the line? Redness? Sluggish? I asked her why it seems to stick out more (where it tunnels)..."It will do that if you're dry or have lost weight." Then they exchange a look

People who are together a lot begin to resemble each other. I'm going to start hanging out with Julia Roberts. Michelle says it'd be a classic 'how-life-is-cruel-to-Chris-story' when poor Julia Roberts starts to look like me! (emphasis hers. Ouch!)

We want our Mom. For all his singing telegram/cat's on the roof, Dad does not do bad news well. He agreed, too. He needs Mom. Roni needs chock-lit shakes around the clock. Michelle is doing a great job, but our sister of the year needs to take some (needed and deserved) time to feel well, too. I said it out loud to M last Sunday: 'the week ahead looks pretty easy.'... (Ma, when will I learn? I should know better than to say it out loud!). By the way, the State Trooper radioed to remind you to fill-'er-up.

Here's what I need: A decision-maker at MOH to say, "We're going to step in here. For compassionate reasons, we're going to fix this for you, right now." OHTAC and its committees and sub-committees can continue to follow their procedures and processes as the application moves from one panel to the next: assessment → review → recommendation → implementation, and I can finally get some relief.

Wanted: Supervisor, Medication Administration. Temporarily, I can't run my meds unsupervised because of adverse reactions during the infusions. I have to run the med at a slower rate, which means instead of 1/2 hr for each dose, it takes 1 hr (plus the set up, and then the finish routine). On top of that: I have to pre-med for my meds. There goes those 4 hrs. free time!

Oct. 13, 2004 - Oct. 12, 2006... Two years of TPN. Total of 17,520 hours... about 13,000 of them connected to the pump.

I read the article discussing voter apathy with disinterest.

Akira Haragouchi recited, from memory, pi to 100,000 decimal places to set a new world record. He can remember pi to 100,000 decimal places ... I can't recall where I put my keys!

I was advised that if I want to leave my outdoor planters outside over the winter, but don't want them to crack, I should turn them upside down. OK, but won't that squish the plants?

I'm so out of the closet with this TPN and IV stuff. I just pull the paraphernalia out and hook up. Wouldn't have done that 2 years ago. My comfort-level, however, doesn't mean I'm prepared to do this for the next 45 years!

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If a sculptor carved a model of me, it could be called Intravenous De Milo.

Created a new expression: Emotional Recession - (noun) - a period of emotional contraction, limited in scope or duration. You read it here first.

Unusual problem with my supply order today. Called Jenya to straighten it out. She told me during the call that she must come to the house to do another assessment and asked what day would be convenient. She said anytime I could arrange for the dog to be unwell, Jessica to take the wrong train and a couple other calamities would suit her schedule just fine. Previous Assessment

Had a visit to the blog today from someone logged in on a server from the Government of the Province of Ontario. The reader spent almost 23 minutes browsing the pages. Each letter and email I've sent to MOH or one of its divisions has invited the addressee to read this blog. Is it really possible that someone did? See the Traffic Report

Wow. 100 weeks. Do I need to say anything more?

The smoke detector needs a new battery. Does that mean I should change the clocks back an hour, too?

Busted! There is absolutely nothing new to report on the status of the pacemaker evaluation by OHTAC so I am posting these other stories to entertain you.

Given up looking for the Medicalert bracelet.

It really doesn't stink to be me. It's just not always easy being me.

The right side of my face is fat...swollen, actually. That spontaneous pain in the tooth is an indication that root canal treatment is needed. I don't know anything about root canal, but when you say that's what you need, people grimace and shudder. This is not reassuring.

OK. Now I understand the definition of spontaneous pain.

I have to find a way to work in other family members' names. Some *ahem* are keeping track. Heregoes:
My sister Lori lives in Indiana with Max, Tiffany and Nicholas. Roni spoke with Lori on the phone on Thursday.

Over the past 8 days, I covered a lot of ground in the province: Southwestern Ontario, Huron County, Golden Horseshoe, GTA, through Clarington to Prince Edward County and Belleville. And across the roads, did not pass one license plate that would advance the game.

I didn't do anything today. Pretty much nothing at all. And I felt like I needed a nap this afternoon. Doing nothing is sometimes as exhausting as doing something.

It was difficult to make that jaunt to Detroit. I wanted to go. Even needed to go. But look at what was involved to be gone 24 hrs. Can I manage something like Jay and Sarah's wedding?

Perspective: Sure, I've had setbacks and feel crummy, but I'm actually healthier than Roni and maybe even Michelle. Very concerned about my sisters.

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Three years ago today (Aug. 14, 2003), David was miraculously not seriously hurt after falling out of a bedroom window at my parents' home. He's got the makings of a great second-storey-man!

Just brought to my attention: The number of weeks I've cited as being on TPN may be incorrect. Might actually be one more...will check that out.
Follow up: No, it's right. Spooky fact: From October 13, 2004 - Aug. 9, 2006, I had been an HPN patient for 666 days.

I manage to get things taken care of. I got through last week which was definitely among the toughest. But I am still incredibly frustrated that some of the most basic, mundane, everyday tasks are an imposing challenge.

To let the dog outside when I'm running the IV is so brutally difficult!

I could barely drag myself out of bed today. I think I've been downgraded to a tropical depression.

It's not a spelling mistake. Happys (as used on the Unstable page) refers to more than one happy, as in, 'happy happy happy'.

Guess what I won? A Mega-box of 48 Oh Henry candy bars. I asked them not to send them to me because of my anaphylactic reaction to peanuts. I was told that according to the rules, all prizes had to be accepted as awarded. It wasn't that I wanted a different prize, I just wanted them to keep it in their lunchroom or someplace like that.

In just 8 more weeks, the amount spent on my home TPN could've been used (should've been used) for a pacemaker for me and one other patient!

Just because I haven't posted a new thought here, doesn't mean I haven't been thinking. I've had plenty on my mind.

Someone's reading this right now. I'm updating pages and the counter just logged another visitor. It's not me.
My visits aren't included in the count-data.

Thank you Kathy M. for noticing I'd gained a little weight.

Check it out. Milestones in 2006: David starts school. Tiffany graduates from Jr. High. Kara starts at King's College at Western. Shannon graduates from Wilfrid Laurier University (double major) B.A. in Communications and English. Rachel starts school, too.

Congratulations Jay and Sarah!

I guess my knee is the least of my problems, so we won't fix it right now.

How is it that OHTAC has not made any recommendations since January? Nothing. No recommendations on anything. Since January.

It's sadly official. The dog weighs more than I. Consider: if I walk him more often or further, we'll both lose weight.

Grass grows in the garden. Flowers grow in the lawn.

Kidding myself. If I am so good at managing all this, why do I need regular pep talks from Anne?

I truly hoped that this would be resolved before I have to go and update my age throughout these pages.
There's still a few days to go.

The $64,000 Question: Can we proceed based on the preliminary assessment alone?

I want to feel well again.

According to the Safety Standards sticker on the side of my IV pump, this pump was to be re-inspected and tested Sept. 2005.

Could the guy who picks up the full 10 gallon Sharps Container be a little more discreet? The only thing missing was the HAZMAT suit!

Was making a list of things I've started but never finished...it's half-done.

Looking for MOH and OHIP definition of "medically necessary" treatment. Can't find one. Definition should include words like 'treatment has a direct effect and positive outcome on the patient's physical and mental health'.

Ellen's hiking and climbing in the Andes. No Scrabble for weeks.

Been reading the Physician Schedule of Benefits looking for a fee code that a surgeon might use to receive payment from OHIP after inserting a gastric pacemaker. Seems to me that 'medically necessary' is defined as 'has a fee-service code' for billing.

How to get TPN stains out of the carpet..

Has the application to OHTAC been filed? List of Technology Under Review
View List of Approved Technology

Why is it that people who are originally from Newfoundland always say, "I'm from Newfoundland."?

I tip the pizza delivery guy, the newspaper carrier, when I get my hair cut, all kinds of service people...what's the protocol for tipping the guy who delivers the TPN supplies? They sent me a Christmas card, and I didn't get them anything.

All this talk about how to get through the holidays without gaining weight is really getting on my nerves. Usually it wouldn't bother me.

I do well managing all this. Really, I do. But I feel like that works against me; in some strange way, I do this too well and that takes me off the doc's radar.

I really love the boots Sarah gave me for Christmas.

1742 km travelled in 10 days. We went to (not in order): Burlington, Barrie, Oakville, Toronto (North York), Toronto (Rexdale), Toronto (Etobicoke), Cookstown, Toronto (Scarborough), Toronto (Beaches), Toronto (Malvern), Hamilton, Mississauga, Vaughan. [Michelle says that's not so much, but I still think that's a lot of hockey]

My horoscope says that now is not the time to argue my case. Says I don't have credibility because of the lunar cycle. I can't afford to buy into that. The Lunar Cycle lasts 29 days and I meet with the doc in just a few.

The advice to not drive after having the Hickman inserted has less to do with sedation/no sedation given, and more because it's nearly impossible to turn your body to safely drive the car in reverse. Hate to say it, but that procedure hurt more than I thought it would.

Truism from Stephen King: If you can count to 9, you can master any Sudoku puzzle.

In an ideal world there'd be peace, love, tolerance, and peanut-free snacks in the vending machines.

Thank you, Martin McCarthy. McCarthy's donated a Stik-Rak to the RBHS 'Wild' Girl's Hockey Team. The team will play in Czech Republic, Germany and Austria in April/06.

Thank you, Dave and Gloria. An evening out, completely allergy-free! You can let the cat out of Kim's room, take the candles out of the fridge and the peanut butter out of the garage.

From Toronto Star Food Section, Feb. 22, 2006 "Fat Nation", (Susan Sampson):

We eat to nourish ourselves. We eat to satisfy our senses. We eat to connect with others around a dinner table. Animals fight over their food;we like to share it. It helps define our humanity."

Stoic...compliment, or not?

If your license plate says IM COOL, you probably aren't.

We either need a longer buffet, or a different filing system.

Nothing to add to this page in a week. What's that mean?

Milestone: 75 weeks! That's longer than the gestation period of the giraffe (15 months). The Asian elephant has the longest gestation at 21 months...that's about 93 weeks.

Ministry could have saved $20,000 already. What does $20,000 buy? Look

Hydration. More hydration. I need to be reminded that the body is a system and fluid is one of its key inputs. Hydration. More Hydration. I don't mean to be difficult. This can all be so dreary. Sorry to make it frustrating for you...to keep repeating yourself is tiring, no doubt. You'd think I'd get it by now. Hydration. More Hydration.

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